About “Workplace Issues” and Mob Psychology

“Workplace Issues” is based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters. I address the bully as well as individuals who partook in mobbing, or bullying by a group.

Mob psychology can only be maintained when the individuals in the group feel no sense of personal accountability. When I execute on this I’ll send all of the letters to the parties whom I’m referencing, as well as a link to the site. That should be effective at creating accountability.

It’s likely that it will take them out of their comfort zone with mobbing because they will be concerned about what others think!

I’ll specify that this combine with the letter addressed to the team sent to the entire professional community should be effective! It’s the combination of the two!

To my Mentor: And on that note!

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

It’s ironic, when you first learned that the perpetrator had lied to me you said, “This guy is good!”

Typically I catch things like that. My intuition kicked in quickly and I wasn’t excited about accepting the position. When I wasn’t excited about accepting the position he accused me of being, “scary good” at what I do.

That’s the pattern. He projected all of his serious character flaws and deep emotional problems on me. And, he believes himself!

To my Mentor: You see in others what is true of yourself! (language warning)

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

The perpetrator saw someone who was, “manipulative…gross, full of shit” and, “immature.”

He also saw someone who was, “Willing to say or do anything to anyone to and hurt them to get what (I) want.”

You saw someone who is, “special and can create.”

You see in others what is true of yourself!

To my Mentor: Seven Years Ago Today, Merry Christmas!

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

Seven years ago today I missed my plan to visit my family for the Holidays. That was okay because I had several Jewish friends and a Bahia one. It was a great Christmas. We had Chinese food and went dancing at a Goth club. My friend referenced it on Face Book today, but I digress. You had a Christmas party that year. I showed up as the last guest left. That was the year after you sold your firm.

Now, when you sold that firm I knew that it was a mistake. I tried to talk you out of it. But, you are as stubborn as I am! It was literally impossible. While you were teaching me management you used to say about me, “I’m doing something different with The Cobra.”

Cobra was your nickname for me. You would continue, “It’s because The Cora is special like me. The Cobra can create like me.”

That evening I asked you how much money you had made in the preceding year because I knew that you would be proud of your income. You told me and you were. You had doubled or quadrupled it.

Then I asked you if you were happy because I knew that you weren’t. You said, “It’s not the same. I’m not creating anymore.”

Won’t you please consider practicing again?

Merry Christmas,

The Cobra Snake

Stop fourth and fifth phase mobbing as defined by Heinz Leymann ~ It’s only nearly impossible! ~ And, I’d love to help…

“The first phase (of mobbing) is usually an unresolved, festering conflict. This triggers aggressive acts and hostile communications in a second phase. In a third phase, management may become involved, i.e. the level of interactions increases, and often, at that point, the target is being slandered or, in the worst case scenario and in the fourth phase, may be branded as mentally ill. This can then lead to the final chapter: expulsion. All that may very well be a tragic outcome of deliberate office politics, but it may also be thoughtlessness and a terrible lack of empathy.” ~ Dr. Noa Davenport

I’m working with the phases of mobbing as defined by Heinz Leymann and articulated by Dr. Noa Davenport. It’s worthy of note that Wikipedia defines this as stage three. Regardless of how stages are quantified researchers agree that distinct phases of mobbing, or bullying by a group, exist. I’ll add that I’m focusing on workplace abuse here. In the fifth stage of mobbing the targets professional reputation is almost always ruined. Currently, it’s considered impossible to fix that damage. Typically the target must relocate or change professions, if not both! This is completely unacceptable!

In order to be effective at correcting damage to their reputation the target must be effective at holding the perpetrator accountable for their behavior. This isn’t mean or confrontational, at all. According to the Harvard Business Review blog we can’t get workplace abuse under control without holding the perpetrators accountable. Moreover, these people reoffend. It’s saving someone else’s mental health and reputation! It’s a good deed and the more ethical course of action!

In the fourth phase of mobbing bullies and employers, frequently they are the same person, create a zero sum game. Either the target is mentally ill or the bully and their cohorts have caused a state of duress that may well have caused a mental breakdown. This zero sum game is easily won, provided the target is healthy again.

Naturally, it will be important to address slander as well. That’s simple. It’s only a matter of addressing it directly. Gossip is almost always inherently irrational.

Severely abusive individuals almost always project their severe emotional problems onto their targets. It’s intuitive that the aggressor is the one with the emotional problems. It’s inherently irrational to trust an abusive individual’s analysis of their victim’s character, period. But people do it. Address both directly!

Bullies count on secrecy and fear. As soon as they are held accountable and the silence is gone, their power is gone. Now, some are potentially physically violent and honestly I’m concerned about that in this case but it makes sense to use discretion there and also confront the possibility directly. It’s ideal to threaten to press charges.

They will try to say that it was a unique and unfortunate series of circumstances. Sometimes victim’s who are in denial come to that conclusion of their own volition. It isn’t true. Address it in advance. These patterns are well researched.

There are two components to handling the abusive behavior by a group. One is to confront each individual publically but without naming their name or position if it distinguishes them, unless they are a decision maker. All decision makers have to be confronted by title. I illustrate how to do this in “Workplace Issues” and in the open letters addressed to decision makers, all of which will be sent publically. The second is confronting the mob mentality. I’m writing a separate instruction page on that.

This is a real situation and I personally was harassed and bullied. The abuse counted as assault as well. It caused post traumatic stress disorder. This is a test model.

I intended to create a model that anyone could duplicate. It’s actually a model that a management professional can duplicate.

For now, anyone who wants to duplicate this please contact me.

I’ll be happy to help for free.

Unlike approaches based on ideology, suc… (via Education Matters)

Unlike approaches based on ideology, successful anti-bullying programs are quite practical and concrete: They use anonymous surveys to sample the current climate within the school. Then they go about changing the culture of the school by working primarily on bystander behavior. They make it OK for students to report bullying by altering the notion of what students consider tattling. Successful anti-bullying efforts address precursor behaviors to … Read More

via Education Matters

Students use creativity to fight bullying (via Red Cross Talks)

*Guest blog from Janice Babineau, Canadian Red Cross communications coordinator in Atlantic Canada * Bullying can happen to anyone. That message was heard loud and clear on Friday when students, parents and even elected officials shared personal stories of being bullied at the launch of the 2nd annual Anti-Bullying Day in Fredericton, NB. Approximately 75,000 youth wore blue t-shirts or blue ribbons to raise awareness on the impact of … Read More

via Red Cross Talks