To the Perpetrator: Regarding your accusation of “bad hygiene.”

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

On the night that you let me go you accused me of having, “bad hygiene.”

I was breaking into cold sweats because I was having a traumatic stress breakdown caused by you.

It is so disturbing that this could happen at a company founded by a woman and with a team that is predominantly female.

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To the Perpetrator: Well, since you went there!

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

You had absolutely no business referencing my personal and specifically sexual history, ever! But, since you went there in the second summer that I represented the firm at which I learned management I briefly dated a third year law student at the most reputable university in the area. He made the observation that I seemed to know the same concepts that the MBA’s did but simply not know the terminology for them! I can reference the theroists now.

Again, you had no place going into my personal life, at all. But, it’s what men who are threatened by women professionally have done for years and traditionally get away with.

Times are changing!

To the Perpetrator: Yes, you made a mistake when you pulled the control.

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

Immediately before you became violently verbally abusive on the last occasion you said, “Did I make a mistake when I?”

You didn’t complete the sentence but the next logical phrase would have been, “pulled the control?”

You finally had the epiphany when I told you that I hadn’t attempted to set up a sales business due to the volatile and unhealthy nature of our relationship. I specifically referenced the fact that you and I were unable to resolve conflict.

The answer is yes, you made a mistake when you pulled the control. For future reference, what big people do is apologize for mistakes and do everything within their power to fix them!

To the Perpetrator: And by the way…

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

That material isn’t right for you. If you aren’t willing to be very honest then it won’t work. It’s deeply unfortunate that you tested that rule with me and even more unfortunate that you abused me. You didn’t think that I’d be able to do anything about it, did you?

To the Perpetrator: Really now?

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

At one point you were giving me advice on how to interact with a client. You said, “You will feel it.”

I certainly don’t need advice on how to follow my intuition from you, enough said!

To the Perpetrator: I don’t think so!

Quick preface: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

I am extremely detail oriented by nature. You are careless and disregard detail. You attacked that strength and tried to persuade me to emulate you in that regard. Obviously you were intentionally attacking all of my strengths but I heard you criticize the same strength in another agent as well.

Imposing your own bad habits and weaknesses on your team members is ineffective management, period.

To the Perpetrator: Exclamation points and humor!

Oh, my exclamation points and humor are signs of my being immature and unprofessional, right? Unfortunately, your observation is incongruent with Kanter. She knows more about this stuff that you do!

Quick note to readers: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

 

To the Perpetrator: Oh for the love of God!

You actually told me that I can’t do residential sales because I’m incapable of dressing the part! That statement is so absurd that it doesn’t deserve an answer!

Quick note to readers: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.

 

To the Perpetrator: If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound?

Rubik's Cube in scrambled state

Image via Wikipedia

You isolated my three biggest strengths as creative problem solving skills, communication skills and consultation skills. You were praising my creative problem skills. Systematically giving approval for creative problem solving won’t strengthen those skills at all. The only way to teach creative problem solving is by setting an example of seeing problems as opportunities. Anything else is ineffective.

You represented a reputable firm when I met you. That firm is a nationwide name in real estate. Business consultants were attempting to teach agents to apply a certain innovation. Indecently, the fact that pricing appropriately and doing the basics of marketing and consultation well is considered an innovation is bizarre, but I digress. Anyway, you had no confidence in your ability to apply that material and you did have confidence in my ability to apply it. Obviously, you had absolutely no business trying to teach me anything about communication or consultation. You should have been asking me questions!

Here is an underlying problem with all of your selections. None of these are specific skills. They are all skill sets. You build the skill sets one skill at a time. You are doing a process that most people can’t feel in a way that is completely ineffective.

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound?

By the way, the answer is no.

To the Perpetrator: I’ll explain a basic of management.

When I initially contacted you I asked if you, “fired your non-productive agents.”

I’ll clarify my terminology. A non-productive agent is someone who has a below average level of production and a negative attitude. It’s always ineffective to pressure team members to do a certain volume of business. It causes them to pressure clients and become complacent once the quota is met. But, someone who does a below average volume of business and has a negative attitude is a liability to the team.

It’s likely that someone who knows that is highly competent. But, you didn’t notice my actual level of competence until you became my client. I would have suspected the truth on the intake phone call and I would have know the truth within twenty minutes or less.