OMFG, you are right!

In the summer that we parted company you said to me, “You are so (exploitive) naïve Cobra!”

You were accurate. One of my biggest weaknesses is corrected now!

But, it isn’t quite that simple. Someone with the qualities that the perpetrator has can frequently manipulate and lie to even experienced executives effectively. This concept is covered in “Snakes In Suits” published by Harper Collins Business Press. There was someone who you employed for several months that followed the same patterns. You finally terminated his employment at my firm recommendation. Later you marveled that you had missed it for so long. I only missed it for a few months also. But, people like that are frequently potentially violent, or at least capable of threatening violence so effectively that it causes a state of duress. Henceforth, my traumatic stress breakdown that it took three years to recover from. That guy is sick and scary!

By the way, he is going to feel like he did nothing wrong. And whatever line of BS he comes up with he will believe. But, the chances of his telling exactly the same story more than once are quite slim.

That is exactly why I didn’t see it or feel it at first!

Edited on December 25th, 2010.

Quick note to readers: “Workplace Issues” is a work of creative nonfiction based on my true story of being bullied. It’s told in a series of open letters.


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What is a gender based hate crime?

"North Hampton is a Domestic violence fre...

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Crimes based on minority status are hate crimes. Not every instance of domestic violence or sexual assault is a hate crime.

Men can be assaulted and can be victims of domestic violence.

But, in America one in six women experience rape or attempted rape and only one in thirty-three men are assaulted. Eighty-five percent of victims of domestic violence are female. Naturally statistics throughout the world vary. These aren’t simply women’s issues. They are human rights violations and public health issues.

I want to make this crystal clear. The feelings and experience of a man who has been assaulted or abused by a partner are absolutely as valid as a woman’s. But, when numbers are this disproportionate it’s reasonable to conclude that the majority of these crimes are based on gender and are hate crimes.

Unfortunately, it’s still common for us to blame the female survivors of sexual assault and domestic abuse. Many states still consider physical violence that could endanger ones partner’s life a misdemeanor. Despite the fact that forty percent of all rapes and assaults are reported only six percent of rapists ever spend a day in jail. And they usually reoffend. Clearly, our society and legal system isn’t taking these matters seriously. While statistics vary throughout the world community these challenges are common.

There is no distinction between women’s rights and human rights. It’s unacceptable for any and all societies within the world community, including America, to allow human rights violations and ignore hate crimes. It’s immoral for any of us to consider it the victims fault for becoming the target of a hate crime.

As long as sexual assault and domestic abuse are shrouded in silence they will continue. Please take twenty minutes and join our team. We don’t need your money or your time. We need your voice.

In breaking this silence and preventing these hate crimes every voice matters, including yours.